Don the Don
Legendary Knight
I told my nan a joke today. It wasn’t funny, but she still pissed herself.
Don the Don
Legendary Knight
I'm bringing out a new radio station called Radio Covid, which will be hosted by Chris Evans.
It'll play nonstop boy bands and girl bands from the 90s.
It's for listeners with no sense of taste.
It'll play nonstop boy bands and girl bands from the 90s.
It's for listeners with no sense of taste.
Don the Don
Legendary Knight
The Independent: Britney Spears says people have no idea of the awful things that were done to her.
Well, Britney, I'm sure you have no idea of the awful things I've done to myself whilst watching the video to .....One More Time.
Well, Britney, I'm sure you have no idea of the awful things I've done to myself whilst watching the video to .....One More Time.
Don the Don
Legendary Knight
Have you donated money to the Conservative party but not yet received a Knighthood? You may be entitled to compensation...
Sarky B’stard
Legendary Knight
Don the Don
Legendary Knight
When I tried to pay for a 12 months gym membership
the bank stopped the card and called me to say it had been stolen ..,.
the bank stopped the card and called me to say it had been stolen ..,.
Don the Don
Legendary Knight
I must say I feel a sense of pride in how enthusiastic the inmates have been towards my attempt to promote healthy eating in women's prisons.
But also slightly disappointed that they felt the need to steal the 200 cucumbers I donated to the cause.
But also slightly disappointed that they felt the need to steal the 200 cucumbers I donated to the cause.
Don the Don
Legendary Knight
According to the media, the body of Desmond Tutu will be 'aquamated', which basically means boiling him in hot water.
Those attending his funeral are asked to bring some chopped potatoes, carrots and onions.
Those attending his funeral are asked to bring some chopped potatoes, carrots and onions.
Don the Don
Legendary Knight
Einsteins theory of you not touching this:
E = MCHammer
E = MCHammer
Don the Don
Legendary Knight
A man takes a woman out on their first date. The evening is a huge success. When he takes her to her door he says, “You look wonderful; you remind me of a beautiful rambling rose. May I call on you tomorrow?” She agrees, and the date is made. The next night he knocks on her door. When she opens it, she smacks him across the face.”What was that for?” asks the man. The woman replies, “I looked up ‘rambling rose’ in the encyclopaedia last night.
It said; ‘Not suited to bedding but excellent for rooting up against a garden wall’!”
It said; ‘Not suited to bedding but excellent for rooting up against a garden wall’!”
Don the Don
Legendary Knight
Be careful of local swimming pools offering water sports.
Some girls are no fun at all and they do press charges.
Some girls are no fun at all and they do press charges.
Don the Don
Legendary Knight
Guys,is it Bellend,Bell End,or Bell-end? It's for a headstone so i need to get it right.
Don the Don
Legendary Knight
What a wonderful world we live in.
I opened the curtains on this crisp icy morning and what did I see?
Only two pensioners outside breakdancing.
They looked like they were in their 80's.
How cool is that at their age?.
I opened the curtains on this crisp icy morning and what did I see?
Only two pensioners outside breakdancing.
They looked like they were in their 80's.
How cool is that at their age?.
Don the Don
Legendary Knight
Start each day with a smile,
Get it over and done with
Get it over and done with
Don the Don
Legendary Knight
Bill and Ben in the bath, Bill goes, "Follobolobolob."
Ben says, "If you fart in the bath one more time...."
Ben says, "If you fart in the bath one more time...."
Don the Don
Legendary Knight
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Marriage guideance service in Norfolk
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half ton
Legendary Knight
I'd give you a high 6 ....but I live in Suffolk
Tallpaul
Legendary Knight
Little Weed goes "Follobolobolob."
Bill and Ben say "Just fucking swallow it, bitch"